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Narcissism in Relationships with Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri (Part 2)

What’s up fam! Today we are welcoming back Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri for another conversation about narcissism and how to navigate it. This is part two of a multi-part series that we are doing and I'm really honored to have this opportunity to chat with her again. In our previous episode together, we talked about some of the different types of narcissism and narcissism in general and today we are focusing on the effects of being in a relationship with a narcissistic person. Tune in!

In this episode… 

  • Spectrum of personality traits 

  • Relationship patterns of narcissism 

  • Love bombing 

  • The 3 C’s

  • Red flags 

  • Trauma bonding

  • DIMMER - what it means and what to look for

  • Gaslighting 


“Narcissists come across as being really curious about you, but really what they're doing is they're collecting as much information so that they can use it against you.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri 

“Trauma bonded is trauma occurring within the relationship and that is the bond between the two.” - Nikki Spo 

“Gaslighting mostly occurs by a person who you trust.” -  Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri 

“Lying is a denial of reality and gaslighting goes on to dismantle the target.” -  Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri 

“I've learned over the years that I can't control how other people treat me or what they do to me or what they say to me or how they try to make me feel. I can only control my reaction to things and how I respond to those situations.” - Nikki Spo 

“You can't gaslight me because I know myself. I know who I am. But when you are in a space of not knowing who you are and slowly your self-worth is being chipped away at and that breaks down over and now you feel like your self-worth is completely diminished, that person is easy to gaslight.” - Nikki Spo 

“Gaslighting is the pathologically insecure person who's praying on the conventionally insecure person.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri 

“Let's not blame the victim. Let's give them the support that they need. Let's give them the understanding.” - Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri 


0:00 - 2:10 | Intro 

2:10 - 5:20 | Relationship patterns of narcissism 

5:20 - 8:25 | Breakdown of narcissistic relationships: Love bombing  

8:25 - 11:55 | Identifying the red flags 

11:55 - 14:05 | Trauma bonded 

14:05 - 15:55 | The devaluing phase 

15:55 - 22:40 | Manipulation 

22:40 - 34:05 | Gaslighting

34:05 - 39:45 | The D and R of DIMMER 

39:45 - 42:40 | Hoovering 

42:40 - 46:05 | Having a narcissistic partner 

46:05 - 48:55 | Cognitive fallouts 

48:55 - 51:15 | Emotional or interpersonal fallouts 

51:15 - 52:10 | Fallout of identity 

52:10 - 53:25 | Physical and behavioral fallout 

53:25 - 55:50 | Giving support 

55:50 - 57:44 | Outro 


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Connect with Dr. Rachna Buxani-Mirpuri 

Connect with Nikki 


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